Introduction

Looking for funny marriage quotes that’ll make everyone laugh? Whether you’re writing a wedding card, preparing a wedding speech, or just need some marriage humor, we’ve collected the most hilarious (and surprisingly wise!) marriage quotes and sayings. From veteran couples sharing their funny marriage quotes to timeless wisdom with a twist, these will bring laughter to any wedding celebration.

90+

Funny Quotes

2 mins

Writing Time

6 Types

Of Humor

Free

Message Generator

Marriage Message Generator

Classic Funny Marriage Quotes

Time-Tested Humor

  • “Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park! ๐Ÿฆ–”
  • “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life! ๐Ÿ˜ˆ”
  • “Marriage: When dating goes past the free trial period! ๐Ÿ’”

Need more ideas? Check out our funny wedding wishes for inspiration!

Modern Marriage Observations

  • “Marriage is mostly about asking ‘What do you want for dinner?’ until one of you dies! ๐Ÿฝ๏ธ”
  • “Married life: When ‘Netflix and chill’ actually means watching Netflix and falling asleep! ๐Ÿ˜ด”
  • “Marriage: The only marathon where eating pizza on the couch counts as training! ๐Ÿ•”

Looking for more clever ideas? See our funny wedding advice!

Funny Marriage Quotes by Experience

Newlywed Phase

  • “First year of marriage: Still checking if you like each other without makeup on! ๐Ÿ’„”
  • “Honeymoon phase is over when you start using your phone in the bathroom! ๐Ÿ“ฑ”
  • “Early marriage is realizing your spouse has never properly loaded a dishwasher in their life! ๐Ÿฝ๏ธ”

Planning an anniversary celebration? See our funny anniversary quotes!

Veteran Couples

  • “10 years in: Communication is 90% eyebrow movements and 10% grunts! ๐Ÿคจ”
  • “After 20 years, we’ve mastered the art of having entire arguments in complete silence! ๐Ÿค”
  • “25 years of marriage: When you both want to be left alone, together! ๐Ÿ’‘”

Funny Marriage Quotes About Daily Life

Household Harmony

  • “Marriage is someone forever asking ‘Did you see where I put my…’ ๐Ÿ””
  • “A good marriage is finding someone who knows how you like the thermostat! ๐ŸŒก๏ธ”
  • “Marriage is having a live-in food critic who never learned to cook! ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿณ”

Need Help With Your Wedding Speech?

Turn these funny marriage quotes into an unforgettable speech!

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How to Use Funny Marriage Quotes

โœ… Do’s

  • Match humor to your audience
  • Keep it light and playful
  • Mix with sincere moments
  • Use relatable examples
  • Credit sources when known

โŒ Don’ts

  • Use outdated stereotypes
  • Include inappropriate jokes
  • Make marriage sound awful
  • Use inside jokes
  • Overdo the sarcasm

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you make a marriage quote funny?

Follow these tips for creating funny marriage quotes:

  1. Start with a universal truth about marriage
  2. Add an unexpected twist
  3. Use modern references
  4. Keep it relatable
  5. End with a touch of warmth

What are some funny quotes about married life?

Popular funny marriage quotes about daily life:

  • “Marriage: When ‘I’ll be ready in 5 minutes’ means 30 minutes!”
  • “The secret to a happy marriage is finding someone who tolerates your snoring!”
  • “Marriage is like a walk in the park… if the park had WiFi!”
  • “They say marriage is about compromise. I agree to disagree!”

When should you use funny marriage quotes?

Funny marriage quotes work best for:

  • Wedding speeches and toasts
  • Anniversary celebrations
  • Wedding cards and messages
  • Bridal shower notes
  • Social media posts about marriage

Always consider your audience and the occasion when choosing quotes.

Create Your Perfect Anniversary Message

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โœจ Perfect mix of humor and sentiment

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๐ŸŽ‰ Wedding Planning Tools & Resources

Last Updated: November 2024

Last Updated: November 2024

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